Friday, April 29, 2011

Flash Fiction Fridays: "Y is for Yssa"


Yssa is the main character in the first novel I wrote. Today I’d like to share a bit of a scene cut from the first draft.

Y is for Yssa

Yssa removed her leather sandals and lay down on a large rock as her fingers trailed in the warm water. The child felt so carefree by the springs, not worrying what her mama would think if she got her nice purple dress dirty or wet. A splash sounded in the spring and soaked her from head to toe. She sat up and looked around.

"Is that you, Apenth?" she asked, but then she heard a burble of a giggle. Fear caused her heart to slam into her chest. She leaned over and stared into the water. "Who’s there?"

A face appeared in the water that was not her own, and Yssa gasped and scrambled backwards when the creature rose half-way out of the water. The water nymph giggled again as she looked at the girl.

"You look like a drowned rat, Yssa."

"I do not." Indignation rose within her, and she stood with her hands on her narrow hips. "You should be more careful."

Curiosity widened the five-year-old’s eyes. “Did Apenth send you?"

"Apenth, Apenth, is that god all you’re concerned about?" The nymph giggled again. The creature’s blue eyes sparkled like the ocean. Green-blue hair flowed around her as if she were suspended under water. The nymph's flesh-like scales over her body glistened in the sun's rays. She was not human, not fish, not quite anything Yssa had ever seen.

"He did indeed send me." The lovely nymph splashed into the water again before reappearing and laughing.

Yssa pushed dark strands of damp hair from her violet eyes when the nymph sprayed her again. "Where do you typically live?" she asked, plopping down on the damp rock.

"I've always lived here, but I haven't shown myself before." She tilted her head to the side and studied the small girl. “Apenth's quite fond of you. He talks about you all the time." In a fluid, graceful movement, the nymph leapt out of the water and sat on the rock beside of Yssa. "He says it’s time for you to leave Mournia. You’re to live in Guntas now."


*If you like writing flash fiction or want to try your hand at it, don't forget about my Flash Fiction Blogfest on May 6th. For more information, click here.*

8 comments:

Ciara said...

Great excerpt. What made you cut it?

Cherie Reich said...

Thank you, Ciara. As for why I cut it, the novel is broken into three sections. In the first one, I had more of Yssa's early life while the other two sections were when she is 17 and 18. I decided to cut out the scenes from when she was 5 and 9 to make it her birth scene and then have her 12 almost 13 when she journeys to the temple of Apenth, which is an important transition before the story continues in part two with her having lived at the temple for several years, etc. The 5 and 9 scenes are mentioned in other places during the story, so I felt they were unnecessary to keep.

Lisa Potts said...

Yssa is such a unique name. How did you come up with it?

Summer Ross said...

I had so much fun reading this! I really liked how the nymph comes about.

Talli Roland said...

I liked this, too! And Yssa is such a memorable name.

Angela Felsted said...

Intriguing. A little scary even. I don't know whether to be happy for Yssa or worried for her, seeing as how I know little about Apenth.

Christine said...

I think that a good teaser for the book!

Nicole Zoltack said...

I love the name Yssa!