I've been considering a book two to Starred. It wouldn't be a true sequel, but it would be set after Starred with very minor characters being the main characters. Winter Stone is one of these minor characters who would have a major role in Played.
Changes
If I rolled up my skirt a little,
then it would be short enough for my date with Nathan. But for now, Mom would
freak if I left the house looking like a skank instead of her perfect little
girl. I straightened the skirt until it nearly touched my knees and threw on a
button-down shirt over my tank top. She’d never know.
My cell buzzed, and I snatched it
off my white dresser.
U
ready? Nathan texted.
I grabbed my brush and ran it
through my bleach-blond hair. Blondes had more fun, right? I’d applied my
mascara thickly, and it made the blue in my eyes pop. Why had I worn those
stupid glasses for years again? I smiled at myself in the mirror and then
puckered my lips, as if practicing for Nathan to kiss me ... and more. A
girlish giggle bubbled from my throat.
Downstairs, the phone rang.
I texted Nathan back. Almost. C u soon. :)
A second later, he text back. ;)
I slipped my phone in my purse and
slung it over my shoulder. The door knob felt cold in my hand as I opened my
bedroom door. A glance back revealed way too much pink in my room. We really
needed to do a makeover. I wasn’t that innocent girl any more. When I turned
back, I bumped into Mom.
“What is ... it?” My hard edge
faltered as I noticed the tears in her eyes. “Is Dad back with the car?”
She swallowed and her body trembled.
Her hand clutched the door frame, knuckles turning white. “Winter, you need to
sit down.”
I crossed my arms. “I don’t have
time for this. I’m meeting Nathan.”
“No, you’re not.” Her voice cut into
me.
I backed up. “Why?”
She entered my room and sank upon my
bed. Her hands pressed against the bedspread. “Come. Sit.”
“I don’t have time for this, Mom.” I
didn’t keep the whine out. Nathan was waiting on me, and if I kept him waiting,
then he’d likely find some other girl to date. I started to head out the room.
“The police called.”
I paused mid-step.
“Your dad and Shawn were in a car
accident.” Mom sucked in a deep breath. “Dead ... on the scene, the police
said.”
I turned slowly to look at her. The
tears poured down her cheeks and dripped upon my bed. I didn’t doubt what she
said, but I couldn’t stop the rush, like a flooded river, roaring in my ears.
My feet dragged me away from her, even as she called out. Soon I was running
out of the house. I pulled my phone out to text Nathan: Pick me up. Please.
14 comments:
Wow, that was powerful.
Cherie, that was super. I was completely involved in the story-telling.
Yiiikes! As a mom of girls this freaks me out on a couple of levels. Nice work here Cherie-
I like the intensity you have in this piece. Thank you for sharing.
Very powerful writing! Thank you for sharing.
Love the juxtaposition of the excitement of a first date with the tragedy. Great emotion.
It's great you have a direction, an mc and the words are flowing. Yay! Send me some of that great mojo please! :-)
Aww! At first, this seemed like such a fun and breezy snippet, but then it sucker-punched me with that reveal midway through. As sad as it was, it was so well-done and powerful. Love it!
Wow, that was intense! Great flash piece! You know how to hook a reader!
A very sad moment for this girl and even sadder way for her respond! But, it seems this is her way of being and it's nicely written. I get a strong sense of who she is just from this little piece alone. ;)
Fantastic. Tense with emotion.
Oh my! That got my attention! Very tense scene.
~Jess
Really great, Cherie! :D
:( Gripping and sad. And terrifying. The setup is so innocent, then wham!
Shannon at The Warrior Muse
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